"During those five months, there was one constant: the Monmouth NICU. It became our home."
A year after her stay in the neonatal intensive care unit, one little girl is thriving.
Amanda Durborow was only 22 weeks pregnant when she went into premature labor. “I was immediately hospitalized and put on bed rest for a week, but my doctors couldn’t stop it,” recalls Amanda, 31, a special education teacher at Rumson-Fair Haven High School. At 23 weeks, on November 22, 2017, she delivered twins Colbie Mae and Bennett Mark, each weighing just over a pound, at Monmouth Medical Center (MMC).
Tragically, Bennett died two days after his birth. Colbie survived, but she spent the first 153 days of her life in three hospital Neonatal Intensive Care Units (NICUs). She survived bilateral brain bleeds, several shunt revisions to remove fluid in her brain, six brain surgeries and one eye surgery. Today, she’s a happy and healthy 17-month-old, something Amanda credits in large part to her stay at the NICU at The Hirair and Anna Hovnanian Foundation, Inc. Regional Newborn Center (RNC) at The Unterberg Children’s Hospital at MMC. “
Those first few months were a roller coaster,” says Amanda. “There were high moments, when I could bathe Colbie or read to her, and then low moments when she crashed. But during those five months, there was one constant: the Monmouth NICU. It became our home.”
Attentive care
One reason Amanda felt so comfortable at MMC was the NICU’s clear communication style. “There were times a physician would explain something to me and I’d write it down, but I had no idea what it meant,” she says.
“Nurses would offer to go over everything with me. They wanted to make sure my husband, Colin, and I felt like part of Colbie’s medical team.” Every morning, when the neonatologist made rounds with residents, Amanda was always included in the conversations. Although Colbie traveled to several other hospitals for her surgeries, the Durborows were always eager to return to MMC. “The level of individual care she received was incredible,” says Amanda. “The minute one of her monitors went off, a nurse would be at her side.”
The NICU staff encouraged Amanda to bathe, feed and read to her daughter, just as she would at home. “We weren’t able to hold her for three-and-a-half weeks, so we would just come to the hospital every day and stare at her in her incubator,” recalls Amanda. “We were parents who didn’t feel like parents.” The nurses sensed that and urged the young parents to connect. “They kept encouraging us to open the door of her isolette and touch her foot or hold her hand, even though we were initially scared to do so,” she says. “They told us to read and sing to her because she’d be reassured by our voices.”
Encouragement for families
MMC has long been a trailblazer when it comes to caring for premature babies. It became the first hospital in New Jersey to establish a NICU in 1968. Today, it’s the region’s largest Level III NICU. It boasts one of the highest survival rates for premature infants in the country.
In the spring, the NICU nursing staff created a “Hall of Hope,” which leads from Labor and Delivery to the NICU. As new parents walk down the corridor, they can view messages of encouragement from parents whose babies have survived and thrived. “We feature former NICU patients of all ages—infants, babies, teens, even college students,” says Bonny Adler, MCN, RNCNIC, Clinical Director of the RNC. “We tried to include many different stories so that all parents can find a family that they relate to, to give them hope.”
Colbie’s story is among those featured on the wall. “I can’t tell you how many people look at her and say, ‘no way is this baby a 23-weeker,” says Amanda. While the toddler’s speech and gross motor skills are slightly delayed, her cognitive development is on track. Every month, Amanda and Colbie visit the NICU to deliver books for The NICU Book Club (see “The Gift of Storytime”). Says Amanda: “Everyone is so thrilled to see how well she’s doing.”
The gift of storytime
During Colbie’s stay at the MMC NICU, her parents would read to her every day. “We’d always read her Goodnight Moon as our way of tucking her in before we had to leave for the night,” recalls Amanda.
“Then, one evening, she turned and looked at us while we were reading. Her recognition of our voices was absolutely amazing.” Inspired, Amanda decided to launch The NICU Book Club. Every month, every baby in the MMC NICU receives his or her own book, which parents can read aloud to them. “There’s very little that’s normal about the NICU experience,” says Amanda. “But one way you can feel like a parent is to read to your baby.”
The book club relies on private donations for funding, but Amanda hopes to eventually turn it into a nonprofit that provides books to NICUs across New Jersey. “The NICU at MMC gave us so much,” she says. “This is one way we can give back.”
Visit the Regional Newborn Center to read more stories about families whose children began their lives at the center.